When you’re a parent, other people who don’t have kids tend to think of you as an expert. But you really aren’t an expert out of the gate, are you? Generally, a parent’s basic understanding about parenting is based upon how they were brought up by their parents. Or, they are influenced by the kind of environment they’ve grown up in.
Walking in your parent’s shoes, and following what the people in your neighborhood think about parenting isn’t really the best path to effective parenting. Your child is the best person to consult if you want to become the right parent to your child.
One line in the movie Forrest Gump is, “Life is a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get”. This also applies to parenting. You never know what type of child you will have, but you still have to be the right parent for him.
As a parent, you would always think of your child as your ideal child. You want your child to fit into your “my ideal child” checklist, which you keep right beside your “my ideal spouse” checklist, right? More often than not, your child doesn’t fit these idealistic expectations. In fact, sometimes they may seem to be the exact opposite from ideal. When this happens, you have to be able to respond appropriately.
When you continue to parent your child like he’s the ideal child, you’re encouraging your child’s bad behavior. That’s why when your child starts acting out, you have to address it as soon as possible.
You cannot eat soup with fork. Similarily, you must use the right tools or develop the right skills, to parent your specific child. There are seminars, online forums and specialists that can help you find out more about your child’s behavior. You can also visit the website for The Total Transformation by James Lehman for handling aggressive, verbally abusive children who behave badly.
Everyone can become a good parent to their children, but not everyone succeeds in becoming an effective parent. When you let your child get away with not doing his homework because he had a bad day, that doesn’t make you a bad parent. But it doesn’t make you an effective parent either. Effective parenting is about doing what’s right for your child.
So don’t settle for being a good parent. Become an effective parent instead.
Looking to fix your problem child? I highly suggest you check this out: The Total Transformation Program. I don’t think this will last long, but you can actually grab a free copy of the program right now. Get it free here..
