I had to run to the grocery store the other day because I ran out of milk and cereal for my daughter. While I was on the aisle where they had all kinds of sweets, I saw another woman and a child. One moment the child was very quiet and the next he was throwing tantrums and literally throwing some things on the floor. No matter what his mom (I presumed) said to him, he couldn’t be placated. I have read many articles about having an out of control child and I know that it is not easy.
Normal children also have tantrums, they cry, even they throw things on the floor. How, then, can you distinguish a normal child from an out of control child?
Here are signs that could help you determine if your child is out of control.
You can consider a child out of control when he often displays aggressiveness towards others or when he seems to be overwhelmingly arrogant, rude, or defiant when he is shown well intended actions. Out of control children may bite for no reason, throw tantrums at will with total disregard to their environment. They spit, whine or cry constantly or they become manipulative just to get their way.
You sometimes ask yourself where you went wrong and you feel that you have failed as a parent. But If I were you, I’d rather spend my time and energy in finding a solution to the problem. There are many kinds of programs out there that can help you in dealing with your out of control child. I’m not talking about just any program, but programs that actually work. I have a copy of The Total Transformation by James Lehman and the programs that I applied worked wonders.
Being a parent of an out of control child is not the easiest thing in the world. It’s physically and emotionally tiring, way too stressful, and overwhelming. However, you need to know that you are not alone and not all is hopeless. I’m going to share with you just a few tips that could actually help you with your child.
Remind your child that you are in control. How can your child give you respect when they know that they can run you? If you let this happen, then it is the end for you. Follow through limitations/punishment. You cannot expect your child to recognize your authority if you can’t even implement the agreed limitation/punishment. Give verbal praises and not monetary rewards when your child has done a good behavior. This will also teach him that not all good things can be rewarded with money. Uphold your authority while you allow your child to have the freedom that he is entitled to. Being too firm or too complaisant is not a good thing to practice and you should be aware if you are doing this. Lastly, if you think that you’ve had too much and you are about to break down or fall apart, walk away and don’t let your child see that he has that kind of power over you.
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