Teach Your Problem Child How to be Responsible

Everybody, especially problem children, has a role to perform in this world. No matter how small the role is, it needs to be done. And with each role that we perform, there are rules to follow; without it, everything would be in chaos.

When your child was at a young age, sometimes you didn’t have the patience to teach them how to do things properly, especially when you came home tired from work. You would choose to do things on your own so it would be done faster. Remember those times when you were teaching him how to tie his shoes, but because you were in a hurry, you would kneel down and do them instead. Like I said, you were impatient to get it done.

As your child grew older, he got used to the idea that his parents were there to solve his problems. He has become a problem child. Now, every time he is in a fix, he just thinks that it is not his problem to solve. He is not accountable for his actions because his problem solvers are there.

You want your children to be responsible, right? I don’t think that there are parents who don’t want this. The thing is that, you may be doing it the wrong way. You need to make your children understand that nobody will always be there for them, thus, it is necessary that they take responsibilities and accountability seriously.

What you can do is explain to your child the roles all of you play inside the house. As a parent, you should tell him what your responsibilities are.

Basic responsibilities of parents:

1. Pay for rent/mortgage.
2. Provide food on the table.
3. Send children to school to give them a good education.
4. Guide children so they make good decisions in life.
5. Be there to support kids/spend time with children.

There may be more responsibilities depending on the needs of the family.

Basic responsibilities of children:

1. Go to school.
2. Do homework.
3. Be good in school (this means behaving appropriately in school)
4. Clean own room.
5. Be home at the agreed time.
6. Study.

Shared responsibilities at home:

1. Household chores (cleaning the house, cooking, washing dishes, mow the lawn).

These responsibilities should be made clear to your child and they need to understand that nobody else is going to do it for them. They need to comprehend that there are consequences for their lack of responsibility. They need to learn how to be accountable.

You should also emphasize that you are not negotiating when it comes to doing these things. Allowing your child, a problem chld, to negotiate with you is a big mistake. This will only make him negotiate every single thing that you tell him to do.

Try to learn new parenting skills when it comes to teaching your child how to be a responsible teenager without the shouting match that usually comes with it.

If you have a child with deviant behavior, I recommend that you grab a copy of The Total Transformation by James Lehman.

Tagged with: james lehman • proble child • responsible parenting • teenager behavior • Total Transformation Program

Filed under: articles

Like this post? Subscribe to my RSS feed and get loads more!